Posts Tagged ‘preschool’

Conversations Pt. 1

What follows are actual conversations I have had at work.

Ja:What’s for Lunch?
K:I don’t know. I’m gonna tell you it’s chicken, because you eat chicken without too much complaint. Yes, I know it smells funny and is slightly green on the edges. It’s chicken. Trust me. Tell me how it tastes, by the way. I refuse to touch it.
Ja:*takes bite and makes face* It tastes awful!
K:Yeah… have some more wilted salad or squishy apples. 
Ja:*gives me a look* You first. 

Jo:How old are you?
K:How old do you think I am? I’ll give you a hint.. I’m older than you 
Jo:6?
K:Nope, I’m 20.
Jo:No, you’re 6!
K:Sweetie, I’m a little older than that. I’m 20. I’ll be 21 in July
Jo:NO! YOU’RE 6!
K:Ok… I’m 6! Put down the scissors and slowly back away from me.

Ja:Does potato count? (for eating them and getting more of the stuff they really want to eat)
K:No J, potatoes are inanimate objects and are incapable of complex thought.
J:Why? 
K:Because they watched too much Spongebob. 
Ja:Is that what happened to you?
K:No… You small zombies have eaten my brains… finish your lunch. 
Ja: Mmmm… Brains! 

K:*I see B hiding under the bridge on the playground structure* Whatcha doing?
B:Hiding
K:From what?
B:Bombs
K:What bombs?
*two shovels wiz past my face and land on the bridge followed by the howls of another child’s tantrum*
B:Those bombs. 

R:*we are reading a book* Are those Aliens in that book?
K:I don’t know, do they look like aliens?
R:No… they don’t.
K:What do aliens look like?
R:They’re green and big. And have penises.
K:… what?
R:They have penises!
K:… oh. Do they now?
R:Yeah! They have to go to the bathroom SOMEHOW! *howls of laughter* 

 

All Day. Monday Through Friday. And you wonder why I barely watch TV anymore… *shakes head*

My Glitter Girls

They say pictures are worth a thousand words. What sucks major caboodle in my line of work is that I can’t share my little smiley faces with you. Or so I thought…

K & J are two little girls in my class. K (on the left) is 3 years old and was a timid little mouse of a girl in the beginning of the year. She couldn’t make it a morning without crying. Now, she can’t make it five minutes without laughing. J is 4, and is my mini me who I babysit on occasion. She likes to change the words to songs to better suit her moods (Five Little Monkies go out to play… over the hill and far away… mother duck says Quack Quack Quack… and wonders why her ducklings turned in to monkies!) They have both decided that they are going to move home with me. It’s ok.. their mommies won’t miss them too much because they will come back and visit. We will play Barbies and make cupcakes – pink of course!

Oh, my silly little glitter girls…

Oh you Cupcake Schmutz Faces…

Sometimes I wish I could post pictures of my little darlings for you all to enjoy. But, I wish to keep my job.

Today, we had a birthday in the room. You know what that means… yup… CUPCAKES!

Imagine this face (not my preschooler)…

… times 17. Somedays I love my job. =)

thanks stacy_brigham on flickr for posting this adorible photo.

Pepto Bismol Pink

Once upon a time, I was a girlie little girl; Ribbons in my hair, dresses, and shiny shoes were REQUIRED to leave the house. Pink was not just a color, but a LIFESTYLE! As I grew older, I came to realize it was a lot harder to keep up with the boys while keeping ones shoes pretty and dress clean. I traded the pretty and prissy-ness in for the still favorite Jeans and T-Shirt (the glitter obsession never fully left). Upon making the decision to be more of an active tomboy, I rejected all things girlie. This included my former favorite color.

Flash forward to Feburaray. Valentines Day is just around the corner, and it’s time to work on the little monkies’ painting skills. Giant paper hearts are cut out of the massive butcher block rolls, and pinned up to the door that we use as the easel.

“Kieran, you like the art area. We’ll put you in charge of painting.” I hear from across the room. Obviously, my jean and t-shirt get up is easier to clean than theirs are. It’s cool… if it stains, it’ll add character, right? I pull out the jugs of red paint that have separated since the last time they were used, and start shaking. “What colors should we do? Red for Valentines Day, but should we put out another one?” I ask.

“PINK!” the little voice below shouts. I look down to see J, the spitting image of myself at 4. She is THE absolute definition of girlie, and she’s smart and funny to boot. She is also holding the white jug of paint with a giant smile on her face. “You’ll need this!” I was hoping for something a with a little more contrast, like black. Why don’t we make black a Valentines color? Draw the Singles Awareness Day in to the schools. Sighing, I pour some red in the bowl and help J pour in some pink. Then, we mix it until the colors blend. J looks at me and makes a face. “It looks just like that peppermint stuff my mommy gives me when I have a tummy-ache.”

She was right – it did look an awful lot like Pepto Bismol, and it had the same consistancy to boot. Great. “Let’s add a little more white and see if we can make it in to princess pink,” I say as I reach for the white. We add another huge glop, and mix, and much to our surprise… it stays Pepto pink. How does that work? 

J decided that she would settle for the “tummy medicine pink” and got her smock on. By this point, word had spread throughout the room about the painting area being open. Leaving the color physics, I spent the rest of the work time putting on smocks and doling out paper.

During clean up, J wanders over to help me hang up the pictures. After putting the last one on the wall, we step back to admire our work. I look over at her, and she is making her face again. “What’s wrong, pumpkin?” I ask. She looks at me. “It looks like somebody puked all over the walls.”

Curse you, Pink, yet again.

Sick-ick-ick-ick

The bad part about being around little kids? You get exposed to new “germs” every second. I am sick, yet again.. *sigh*

Interview tomorrow for summer job… and TONS of stuff to do for Kids With Heart. I’m taking Nyquil and going to bed. But first, I leave you with this little gem…

I have a little girl who looks almost EXACTLY like this… except blonde. Any three-year-old well versed in Star Wars is an awesome kid in my book.

Professional Bodily Fluid Cleaner

I work in as an AmeriCorps member in a Preschool. This still makes me laugh, because I spent my two years at college trying to stay as far away from Education as possible. That being said, I can imagine a better place to work. Even if it means exposing yourself to all sorts of little nasty things that can kill you.

I am speaking of course, of all the excretions that come out of small children. I have delt with boogers, pee pants, moving of the Poop in the Pull-up by hand in to the toilet (an on to.. and next to… etc), puke of various colors and textures, and of couse, blood.

We were in the gym. There were 5 kids, the teacher, and myself. The little boy got a bloody nose. Not a big deal – it’s the middle of March, the air is really dry, and he was running around. Upon wiping the new wet stuff off his face, and realizing it wasn’t sweat or snot,  he had to deal with it in such a manor that only little boys can deal with such things.

G: MY HEAD IS LEAKING!!
Kiwi: No, it’s just your nose bleeding. Let me get you a tissue and you go sit down and relax. *starts walking to tissue box across room* Try to catch it in your hands so it doesn’t get all over your clothes and the gym mats.
G: I’M BLEEDING!! I’M BLEEDING!! *starts flipping hands around, thus sending pathogen carrying droplets far and wide.

Needless to say, I had to clean that up. Good Ol’ Green Machine… you’ve served me well here.

[Yes, I had a MUCH longer, and slightly funnier post on this... but silly me, still trying to figure out how to work wordpress... deleted it. Epic Fail]

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